Buddhist Thoughts is the SLC Buddhist Temple newsletter which is mailed to Temple members each month. Here we provide excerpts from archival Buddhist Thoughts.

2003 December

Embraced by the Compassionate Light
by J.K. Hirano

Since at the beginning and end of our lives we are completely dependent of the kindness of others, how can it be that in the middle we would neglect kindness to others?

-- Dalai Lama

Although my eyes blinded by passions
Do not see the warm light that embraces me,
Great compassion never tires
Constantly casting light upon me.

-- Shinran Shonin

There was a time in my life when I studied the dharma quite seriously. I tried to memorize systems of thought, chains of interdependence, true, provisional, transcendent teachings etc. Learning movements for ritual or the particulars of a certain chant, held great importance. With a very naive perspective, I thought that through this type of systematic practice, the world would be easier to understand. It was as though most aspects of human existence could be classified into some little place within some system.

There was a great deal of naivety and innocence in this type of thinking. Before leaving for graduate school to study Buddhism. I had seriously considered law school. In a similar manner, I thought that law school would provide me with a means to understand the society I lived in. In fact my leaving to study Buddhism was intended to be a two or three year break, until I would return to enter law school. I felt that the Institute of Buddhist Studies would provide me with a way at looking at life from an Eastern perspective and that my attending law school would provide a western form of thought.

In no way would I belittle either form of study. I still enjoy reading books on Buddhism and I try to keep up a certain level of academic understanding. However, in no way would I consider myself a scholar. Scholars seem to spend their lives, researching particular aspects of their chosen area of research. Learning the smallest nuances of their subject. Many that I have met, seem to be willing to give up their personal lives for study. I have neither the needed discipline or desire for such a life.

I also enjoy watching shows about law. The goal I had originally set for myself in college was to become a judge by the time I was thirty five years old. In some ways, lawyers in our society seem to have become the new priestly class. Without a good lawyer, there are many things we cannot do in our society. It is often necessary to ask a lawyer to interpret a document written in English, for they have created their own language. If you have ever been in a court of law, you can see the similarities between it and a religious chapel. The judges even wear robes and have a set hierarchy.

Since I have chosen the life as a Jodo Shinshu priest, I can see that I am neither scholar, nor am I a priest in the traditional manner, though I still wear robes. Jodo Shinshu is a type of Buddhism that is meant for the laity. Shinran Shonin considered himself neither priest or layman. Shinran is considered by many to be the first priest to leave the celibate and monastic lifestyle. He was married an had children. Just as many of us do. In leaving the monastery, I feel that Shinran was not trying to break any great rules or to start a religious revolution, as many scholars believe. He was also not trying to form a new type of priesthood. He was merely trying to understand life. Which I am sure was the original intent of his entering the monastery on Mt. Hiei in the first place.

Within Jodo Shinshu, we learn about life, from life. Within the busy lives of earning a living, raising our children, interacting with family and friends. Most of us don't have time or the inclination to sit in meditation for hours and days. Long drawn out rituals to change our everyday mode of thinking are very difficult, with your child calling you for for a glass of apple juice or to change the video.

Over the past few years, I have finally felt settled in who I am. There is a deep appreciation for the way life has embraced me, while I ran from one place to another, searching for answers. Without my asking, life has seemed to embrace me with wonderful friends, who accept me for what I am. There are times when I have to stop and marvel at the friends I have been blessed with in my life. I have not changed, in that I am still stubborn and short tempered at times. Yet my friends have been with me for years. The members of the temple have accepted me with all my inadequacies. My family has put up with my various incarnations over the years and still accept me as father, son. brother, nephew, uncle, etc. In giving Dharma talks, I often speak of Amida's compassionate embrace. How this compassion surrounds us just as we are. It is not judgmental, it does not tell you what to do. It is just there and you must just open your eyes to it.

Christmas and the Holiday season is a very busy time of year. Yet it is one of the best times to truly open your eyes to the embrace of compassion. Over the past year, I'm sure each of us have had times of laughter and times where we have shed some tears. We have all had loved ones die or go through illness, in which we felt helpless. The flowers on our altar, should remind us, that this is universal. You are not alone in those feelings of loss. Yet, right next to those flowers are the candles upon the altar. The light of enlightenment, compassion. Those same lights blaze in your child's eyes.

I have found that the altar and our rituals can be found all around us. Life has taught me about impermanence. Yes, our friends and family will not always physically be with us. The warm light of compassion is all around us, from the lights on your Christmas tree and throughout your neighborhood, to the warm embrace of your child's hug and that love in their eyes. Our chanting is one of appreciation. It is not a ritual to change your life, but to affirm what you have. I hear that when my daughters say, "Daddy I love you." and I respond, "I love you too." Namo Amida Butsu is nothing more than the call of our universal parent calling us and our responding.

Our temple is a place to remind us of all that we have around us and should be grateful for. It is sustained by each of in gratitude for what we have each been blessed with. Yet we can also find those things all around us. Or the support you have given the temple throughout the year. And I would like to especially thank you for your acceptance and support of Kacie, Taylor and myself. Words cannot express the gratitude I feel for all that you have done for us. We hope that each of you will have a wonderful holiday season and new year. Can it be otherwise, with Amida's compassionate embrace? Merry Christmas, Happy New Year and Namo Amida Butsu!

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